Monday, October 17, 2005

dancing with my eyes closed

something inside of me tells me to close my eyes. something told me to just enjoy the moment. roll with the beats. didnt notice whats going on around me. ignored the signs. lived in a dream that 'of course it's all ok...' but then, as always, i bumped into someone. My shoulder connected with their rib cage. coughs... chokes... cry... my arm hurts, but i imagine the pain to be worse for the chest. its such a foolish thing to dance with my eyes closed, to dance in dreams. where what you think your doing and what you are doing are two completely different things.


rapunzel.emma said...

I sometimes feel like I am living with eyes closed at the moment, trying to feel my way in the dark and bumping into everyone around me.

To lose yourself is sometimes necessary...?

Daniel McCosker said...

Fortunately you both have people who can offer guidance, or at least fumble along with you.


gaylourdes said...

It is one thing to dance with your eyes closed, and bump into people because the language of dancing is visual, and people make sense of it by watching/not watching bodies, dancing to be seen to be looked at. To dance without looking is a virtuosic effort, supreme confidence in the moving of one’s body in space; or an attempt to step outside of the looking/ not looking paradigm. (To be alone, perhaps, on the dancefloor?)

However, it is another thing entirely to realise that there is a whole world behind you, which is not acknowledged in all this looking. And you wouldn’t see this anyway, despite all the looking/ not looking. To dance with the awareness of the world behind you, it changes your posture, the way your ears turn to the music, you won’t bump into people. I think this is a very important thing. Central to the groove is an idea of community, of sharing something with someone or something. Don’t be alone on the dancefloor.

Of course, the idea of being alone on the dancefloor is not the ultimate point I wanted to get across, but it grows out of being aware of what is behind you. In Japan, I am told, there is a different cultural perspective on moving about among lots of people than in ‘the west’. A shared belief/ faith that you won’t run into each other, even if you’re flitting like a school of fish in a confined space. A different sensitivity.

And i don't think it's foolish to dance in dreams. In fact, some of my best dreams are dances.