10. the souls of people

There was a line of thought that marked the mind of Sebastian. It was a line to the truth. Or perhaps rather the problem of truth. If one follows this line 'to ' the truth, one inevitably finds that the line has no end. If the line has no end, then there is no truth. But if there is no truth then to where does the line point. It is knowledge - philosophy, science, fact and experiment which measures out this line. A quest for truth that is a profound paradox.

The problem of the truth lead Sebastian to the worlds of fact and science. Unlike religion, unlike faith science could explain and not simply promise. He began a search for the truth, all for the sake of truth. He would read his books on physics and geology, on Einstein and Feynman. But more than this 'strict science' kind of reading, he liked his books of facts. think books on how trains work, and deep readings on the rivers of the world. For all his cute 'ocker' ways he was a very smart man.

He took a silly little pride in him self for reading books that others would simply dismiss. For instance the 'history of salt' was one such exemplary title that could be placed on this list. The list itself would be as random as the images one would see when flicking between Animal Planet, National Geographic and the Discovery Channels on the telly. In a systematic 'bit of everything' kind of way.

A soul that is defined by the search for truth is not willing to settle on the truth of things of the natural world alone. As things are discovered, they turn their attention to those things undiscovered. Eventually they mays settle on the undiscoverable. Physicist found quantum theory. Freudians found the unconscious. Sebastian found Love. In his own idiosyncratic way.


What is the truth of love?

Is the truth in the word or the action? There is the old dictum that 'actions speak louder than words' that words lie, and that it is actions tell the truth. This is the voice of one of two types of people. The person who would speak this phrase is one who would hate words. Words can lie. It is only in action do we reach the truth.

This would not suffice for Sebastian. The dictum is paradoxical. It must fail itself in order to prove itself correct. Instead Sebastian grew to view things differently. It was words, knowledge that were the truth to action.

What is it worth if you have love but cannot say the words i love you? 'The actions would just be a lie' Sebastian hypothesised. 'whats it worth if you cant say it?' Sebastian saw the role of declaration to be bound to words alone. Right or wrong Sebastian grew to be a person who loved words. he was never afraid to say the words 'i love you'.

It is these same words that made Jonas' heart quiver with unease. He had heard the words before and had seen the way words can lie. Jonas had grown to hate words.